December 29th 2016

I first noticed I had a problem when I started typing words incorrectly.

It wasn’t simply a ‘typo’ but it became a ‘programmed’ way of typing a word. The first word I had this problem with was a very simple one; the word ‘the’. I started typing it as ‘teh’ and the error became fixed anytime I was typing fast and concentrating on getting a sentence written and my mind got ahead of my fingers.

I could see there was a problem once I went back and read what I had written but at the time I was typing, it just didn’t register.

I had a brain scan and was told what I already knew, my brain was showing signs of deterioration. My father died from Alzheimer’s so it wasn’t that much of a shock to discover that I was also showing signs but instead of being in my 70s or 80s I was in my 50’s. It was early onset.

The problem with ‘the’ spread to other words and I found myself adding letters that I did not intend to add.

Gradually my short-term memory got worse and worse to the point where now, a simple thought can come into my head and completely displace what I was about to do.

This becomes very frustrating as I know there was something I was about to do, some task I had to undertake, but a second’s distraction wipes it from my mind.

My eyesight (that has always been horrible) is also suffering and my depth perception is now very poor. I am now clumsy and knock things over all the time.

I was never the most patient person but now my temper gets the better of me and I am inclined to deliberately destroy things that irritate me.

One thing that is pretty well guaranteed  to set me off is someone telling me I should have remembered something.

I am not doing this for fun! I am not doing it to annoy other people, I am forgetting because I CANNOT REMEMBER!

I find it very insensitive and incredibly irritation to be told I should have remembered something when ‘blind Freddy’ could see that I simply cannot do it any longer.

People dealing with dementia sufferers need to be made aware that this is a real source of tension and trauma for the sufferer.

(I have underlined the words above because coming back and reading the sentence again, I can see the problem. I know the grammar is wrong and at one time I would have never typed irritation instead of irritating.) – Argh! it took me three (make that FOUR) attempts just to get this correction right!

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